You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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