just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Randomize