I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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