"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
