I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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