After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
