there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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