And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
stop calling my apartment porn island.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
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he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
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You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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