But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
