we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
