I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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