I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
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When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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