erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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