My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize