Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
