Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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