Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
