i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
sarcasm needs its own font
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
