I want to have your abortion
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
