In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
i came on her dog
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"