Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
