I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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