ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
