I am puke
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
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if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
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Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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