she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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