I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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