Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
