i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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