the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I want you more than these girls want KFC
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
