Texts From Last Night

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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.

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  (937): I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again. http://tfl.nu/hfw8
  Replies (2) Good night (1161) Bad night (1041)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.

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  (917): I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home. http://tfl.nu/cetg
  Replies (3) Good night (1459) Bad night (655)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.

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  (207): There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever. http://tfl.nu/jepg
  Replies (8) Good night (3213) Bad night (574)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.

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  (727): If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends. http://tfl.nu/hu0f
  Replies (25) Good night (573) Bad night (3486)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.

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  (803): What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible. http://tfl.nu/1wu4
  Replies (11) Good night (7176) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  New channing tatum movie.

  (858): View more from California

  I'll bring my vibrator.

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  (303): New channing tatum movie. (858): I'll bring my vibrator. http://tfl.nu/ing8
  Replies (26) Good night (6513) Bad night (1335)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?

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  (314): Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me? http://tfl.nu/x7by
  Replies (35) Good night (2567) Bad night (10242)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR

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  (604): I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR http://tfl.nu/a8v0
  Replies (15) Good night (3152) Bad night (1935)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.

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  (917): Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap. http://tfl.nu/690y
  Replies (16) Good night (3738) Bad night (1427)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control

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  (201): just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control http://tfl.nu/3b72
  Replies (7) Good night (1052) Bad night (1899)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"

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  (781): he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me" http://tfl.nu/6fll
  Replies (16) Good night (1704) Bad night (2795)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow

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  (612): SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow http://tfl.nu/34f4
  Replies (3) Good night (1085) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.

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  (937): Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills. http://tfl.nu/u4sm
  Replies (0) Good night (442) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment

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  (651): I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment http://tfl.nu/g035
  Replies (2) Good night (555) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub

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  (925): You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub http://tfl.nu/o6o5
  Replies (0) Good night (503) Bad night (293)

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