Texts From Last Night

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  (226): View more from Ontario

  forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.

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  (226): forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions. http://tfl.nu/kw3s
  Replies (15) Good night (7908) Bad night (1103)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself

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  (907): I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself http://tfl.nu/s5eu
  Replies (11) Good night (3075) Bad night (599)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.

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  (859): Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things. http://tfl.nu/chhw
  Replies (6) Good night (3631) Bad night (1014)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account

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  (251): you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account http://tfl.nu/ufbc
  Replies (20) Good night (5454) Bad night (1316)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  And I meant every ounce of it.

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  (978): You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands. (864): And I meant every ounce of it. http://tfl.nu/062o
  Replies (7) Good night (1374) Bad night (2282)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.

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  (512): I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters. http://tfl.nu/dc1b
  Replies (1) Good night (1165) Bad night (758)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig

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  (406): we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig http://tfl.nu/68f1
  Replies (7) Good night (587) Bad night (1985)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.

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  (940): Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things. http://tfl.nu/0rsv
  Replies (10) Good night (1974) Bad night (560)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.

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  (801): Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month. http://tfl.nu/irqs
  Replies (14) Good night (2082) Bad night (1229)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5

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  (413): Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5 http://tfl.nu/y1kc
  Replies (9) Good night (1129) Bad night (557)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it

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  (240): A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it http://tfl.nu/zmnm
  Replies (3) Good night (1286) Bad night (575)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take

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  (443): me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take http://tfl.nu/nsgg
  Replies (11) Good night (1872) Bad night (468)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.

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  (979): It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people. http://tfl.nu/1jp1
  Replies (4) Good night (833) Bad night (612)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum

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  (989): Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum http://tfl.nu/sqi2
  Replies (1) Good night (789) Bad night (304)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?

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  (801): WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office? http://tfl.nu/kj4z
  Replies (5) Good night (512) Bad night (802)

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