I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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