didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
