are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
