Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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