I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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