you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
