i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize