"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize