Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
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Apparently you are. And I'm pretty sure you're my best friend. Or her soulmate.
Liquor up front and poker in the rear
The fact that you even have to ask that question points to some pretty big issues, my friend...
I don't know if you are, but you COULD be....come beg for liquor at MY house!
Translation: Giving out blowjobs for free liquor at some random guys house
I'm sure you don't do that all the time. You probably have a trucker hat, too.