is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
a search helicopter?!
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
