IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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