FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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