What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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