bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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