I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
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