Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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