Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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