Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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