She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
