Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
dude. I can hear the air.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
