He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize