Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
